Make your communication skills more effective

Communication is one of the most important tools with which we carry out our daily activities, it is a very useful ingredient in our bid to fulfil the essence of our livelihood.

Communication is the exchange of information between a sender and a receiver through a channel that must bear a communicative commonality between both parties. The communication process can only be complete if the receiver understands the sender, as this is the bedrock of any meaningful and effective communication. It is the chain of understanding that integrates all the parties involved in the communication process.

As important as communication is, in our personal and business lives, so also is the ability to ensure its effectiveness.

However, there are numerous problems that affect our communication, and hence, hinder it from being effective.

Simple issues that could be solved by being polite, analytical and constructive are being left to degenerate into conflict situations as parties refuse to reason along the path of what is being communicated.

 There is no doubt that up till this present day, the lack of honest and open communication is a common denominator in our dysfunctional families, societies and business relationships. This is because we continuously fail to communicate constructively, and in a straightforward way. There are marriages greatly suffering because partners cannot speak honestly and openly at issues affecting their marriage. We have seen marriages crumble because of couples’ inability to speak respectfully and constructively with each other, simply by failing to apply the basic communication requirements needed to promote tranquillity at home. Also, over 60% of work place problems are as a result of breakdown in communication between and among staff. This trend increasingly, implies that there is still the need to foster effective communication in all parts of our society.

  For communication to be effective and meaningful, you should always say what you mean the way you mean it and communicate your thoughts, feelings and opinions in a healthy and constructive way. The way you communicate is a manifestation of your wholeness as an individual and says a lot about you. If your communication skills fail to be adequately right, it snatches away the full benefit and potentials you can claim in both your social and spiritual world.

Sometimes, for the fear of unknown, or simply pulling back at something, you leave things unsaid, allowing them to fester within you, creating and deepening the roots of self- discomfort, dejection and perhaps hatred or other negative feelings towards yourself and the other person; invariably burying the cause for a great way to maintain good relationship both at home and at work; wherever it may have occurred,  because the other person, will not know what is in your mind and such habits breakdown relationships. Learning to improve your communication skills can have positive and permanent rewards for your business performances and personal relationships.

You should learn to be a better communicator, as this fosters and maintains good work environment and peaceful co-existence among people.   Language skills is though the primary form of communication, sometimes expressing our selves with other body languages may well be more adequate than just using words of mouth. These choices in ways of communicating makes it better to fully express your thoughts and feelings in different places, and different ways as suited by the situation. As much as you want to be a good communicator, so also should you learn to listen properly. We all know the hurt we feel when we realise that someone we are talking to is not listening, to us, but to gain such, attention, you should also exhibit interest in the other person’s feelings, thoughts and opinions. For any communication to be effective, listening is perhaps more important than talking, as the understanding that exists between both parties greatly, forms the bond.

Sometimes, being able to communicate effectively may require great practice, and a need to overcome your fear and self – consciousness. You may also need to actively learn to talk with other people, with the necessary communication skills. Skills to initiate conversation, keep it going and ending it appropriately may seem a bit difficult, but trying these tips will definitely simplify the process for you.

• Learn to communicate your thoughts, feelings and opinions   openly, honestly, and straightforwardly.

• Talking out of negative emotions such as anger, frustration, etc., is never beneficial as it rumples the communication process.
• When you have to give instructions or make numerous requests, do it sequentially, don’t muddle up things. Be logical, clear and direct when communicating and always complete your dialogues.
• Do not assume that your recipient knows what you intend to say.
• Understanding your communication skills and deficiencies help you structure your pattern and style of communication and ensures its effectiveness. Take time to study yourself and find ways to improve where necessary.
• Try to be flexible in your communication styles and approaches, by applying necessary and basic communication techniques at different times as you require.  
• You should exert some control over the flow of the communication. When you have difficulties in expressing yourself at any  given time, take a deep breath, get your points together, familiarise yourself with your message and see it flow within you as stress free as possible before voicing it out.
• Mind the tone of your verbal communication, as tones depict different meanings to what is said. Be sure of the impact you want your communication to have on your recipient in a bid to express yourself as intended and be understood in the same way.  
• Good listening makes communication more productive, particularly when we listen, to understand in an empathetic and non-judgemental way.
• Always communicate with the spirit of understanding, positivity and respect.

All these tips are useful to make communication processes more effective at work and at home.

As an individual, it is a personal responsibility to discover the power of your communicative potentials and of utmost importance to use it, positively to your advantage. The way you communicate tells other people how you perceive yourself and also influences how other people relate to you.

Ways to use music for effective self empowerment and actualisation

What is music to you? How does music affect you?

Generally, we may say music is an artful blend of sounds. It should also be harmonious, rhythmic and melodious.

However, to different people, music connotes different meanings and as such, it is responded to differently. Individual perception and responses to music greatly depends on taste, though, generally, music is perceived to be an exciting intake for human senses and well being, provided it is good music. What then constitutes good music?

You may like to consider what music has the ability to make you feel happy, sad, anxious, energetic, optimistic or depressed, so as to know how well to apply music to achieve positivity.  To add to the effect of music is the inserted lyric, which adds another dimension to it. If the words are uplifting you are more likely to feel encouraged about everything than listening to words that helps you go down in dejection.

Songs of hope, appreciation, songs strengthening your purpose in life and inspiring you  that you can make good of your life if you work hard and try;  and not sad songs that help you wallow more in  self-pity and  make you believe what’s lost is gone and there is no more hope for you, should you get attuned to .

Songs that will depress you further and render your energy and strength useless should generally be avoided for the sake of positive self-development. Only songs that will keep you going and help you look for ways to make the best out of life should be reckoned with. However, mindful and positive use of music can best be result oriented, because just like other intoxicants, so also can music intoxicate? Music should be listened to, proportionately, not allowing an overdose of it, and good music that will help you focus on positive trends are the best. Accurate appreciation and perception of music is a valuable skill you should aim to acquire.

Research has also shown music to play a significant part in the development of the synaptic connections in cell networks. This, in turn, has positive effects on children’s and adults’ learning abilities. A number of studies have shown the power of music as a plus to cognitive abilities like reasoning and motor skills. The ‘Mozart effect’ is just one example of the effect of music on intelligence.

Music is not just very powerful at affecting your mood state instantly; it overwhelms your entire make-up.
Once you are aware of how music affects you, this is your personal power, which you must use in choosing your kind of music, to attain what emotions you want to build up, e.g.  If you are feeling desperately tired, do certain tunes give you energy? What helps if you’re thinking gloomy?

For your own self-empowerment, music that inspires you to achieve positivity is just all you need.

Here are some of the other benefits of Music:

Music  enhances listening skills
It is a great tool for relaxation and helps reduce stress levels
Music prevents you from focusing on problems
It transforms negativity into positivity
It helps in developing one’s intelligence
It helps improve concentration and sometime allows for clearer thoughts

Consider how best music works for you and increase the benefits therein. It is one of the tools for greater self-actualisation which helps you take control of your life and working towards your goals and dreams. As you work more on your Self Development, adding music to your other tools,   will help you achieve more success.

Making the most of your precious time, is not just time management

Time is going, yet moves not

I race against time, still cannot catch.

Motionless as may be, its speed I dare not match

Time is going, yet moves not.

What is it about time that we often find ourselves struggling with it?  After all time is our opportunity. It is the privilege of the period we have to exist and do what we want to do. We are supposed to be in control of our time, though not in a way to be accurate about every detail of our everyday events, but definitely in some other ways. The fact that we can’t hold down time and make use of it as frivolously as we wished is absolutely what gave time the edge over us. No wonder there is so much about the ‘big thing’ TIME. Time is precious and time is the absolute factor we run our lives on. It is almost everything. A time to laugh and a time to cry, a time to be serious and a time to play, there is about time for everything. How conscious are you about the opportunity of the time you have?

Time management in the professional sense of it, is just but the process of exercising conscious control over your allocated work time in regards to specific activities, especially to increase efficiency or productivity. In situations like this, you talk about planning, allocating, setting goals, monitoring, organizing, scheduling, and prioritizing, all these are office jargon.

How do you utilize your everyday time? Is it possible to turn your time into such that will be remembered by you and others as beyond fulfilling?

How well do you seek to spend your time? Do you always look for time to chat away and get drenched in unending wrangling? Or is it work without limits?  There is no doubt times are stiff nowadays, but remember time will always throw back what you throw at it. If you believe in managing your time properly to accommodate responsible working, quality time with friends and family as well as other squares you have to attend then you can achieve it. Good management of time and resources help create a balance in an individual’s work, social and spiritual life, and striking this balance, is what tells how dignifying an individual is.  It is good to take advantage of the time we have to do what ought to be done. By this I mean don’t leave what you have to do today till tomorrow, because tomorrow may be too late. “Make hay while the sun shines”. Don’t postpone the start date of a project you were supposed to start today till tomorrow, because the opportunities present today, may not be available tomorrow. If you are planning to make some amends with an old friend, family members or other loved ones, do it now, the opportunity you have now may cease to be there later. Tell someone you love them, show appreciation to those who deserve it and begin to make your mark where you deem necessary, for times waits not, even though we are the ones running.

Make your time alive precious, beaming endlessly as a time to always celebrate.